Getting old is a Bitch, And There is no Escape From It

There is only one alternative to getting old, no it’s not death

Our friends begin to die, your family is almost all gone; the rules change, your heroes become meaningless to others, and your cool and young self begins to fade. The new generation does not understand you, and your jokes are no longer funny. But wait, there’s more.

You look in the mirror and see an old dude, and you ask yourself? Who is that? But you don’t have time to think about it because your back hurts, and you can’t figure out why you have this little bulge in your abdomen. You call your friends you still have and look forward to having some fun, but they don’t feel very well today either. So you sit on your ass at home.

Thankfully you still have your job, but for the past five years, all you've been thinking is to quit: I’m done. I’m retiring. But then you figure you won't see anyone without your job. So you stay working for another year. But the time is coming when you’ll lose that too.

Getting old has many phases. But there is a point when things begin to change fast. It’s like that moment in the sunset when it gets darker quickly. When you enter this phase, you see some dramatic, scary changes. The loss of your entire family is a big one. But in the end, you come to the stark realization that you’re not immune to anything. And at this point, you arrive at the head of the road; you did this before, but this one is a big one, and I call it —the free sample of death.

We are all going to die one day, but in this advanced phase of life we begin to see death. When we were young, death was this obscure allegorical thing we never had to worry about. But when all the things you once held dear and the very things that are the pillars of your life disappear, you begin to see death up close and personal.

Some people just can’t handle this moment very well, and mixed with some debilitating physical challenges, they succumb to depression. People just give up. They were not in great shape, to begin with, and now with age, the possibility of thriving is remote. Depression set in, and disease loves depression. The feedback loop from hell is paved.

But let’s get back to my proverbial head of the roads. Some people take the route of depression because they think there is no more chance of living. They have no friends, and the world becomes very constricted and stuffy. And all you have is time, nothing but time and nothing to do. And at that very moment is where the magic can happen.

You see, the opposite of shit is gold. Your garbage can prove that the decaying matter is transformed into rich compost. And after you place it on the ground, beautiful flowers and delicious vegetables can grow. Usually, the other side of a problem is the solution, so don’t throw away your perceived end-of-life problem. Life is not over until it is over; you are still not off the hook.

Take the other road. And on this road, you come to a full realization and acceptance of where you are. You embrace your fears like a cold shower. There is no fight and sad feelings about all you have lost. You know they are somewhere out there, and you’ll get it all back one day. You embrace your precious time. Remember time? Yes, you always wanted more time. You have plenty of time on your hand and will enjoy it. But it gets more interesting.

And that is because even though you have plenty of time, you don’t have much time. Time is going faster than ever. So, you don’t have time to waste. This is a fascinating dichotomy. You have all the time in the world, but you can’t afford to waste any of it.

This realization, this little switch in your mind, is such a tiny thing, such an invisible and light as a feather change of mind. But it is monstrously large and fruitful that can make you decide between taking the depression road or the happy old person road. It can make a huge difference in your mental and physical health and make you grow old the right way rather than misery and sorrow. Old age, sickness, and death is a chronic disease, and we all got it.

Because if you don’t change your attitude towards old age, you’ll not have the energy to keep doing things, and you’ll not have the right frame of mind. Some people say that nothing gets easier as we age. But I disagree.

Some things are easier as we age. But we have to look for them in the right places. Of course, if you are trying to be young and compete with the young, you’ll be a very, very sad person. But if you embrace old age with all its colors and smells, you’ll be much happier than you’re young, insecure, and not knowledgeable about anything since you know everything now. Own it and use it. There is no time to waste.

Photo by Bruno Silva