On growing old, most preparations are futile, but one
One day I asked this little old lady who had just completed 100 years. Are your friends coming to see you? They are all dead, she replied. And that is what will happen to you if you live long enough; everyone you know will die. Enough of that; let's talk about our 60s because that is more where I’m at.
You don't need to be one hundred years old to know that things will change soon. And the winner is — loneliness. That's right. No matter what you do, all roads lead to loneliness in the country of old age. If you think you're going to get old and have all this social life when you retire, don't worry, it's all part of this mass denial production values we have as we age. Let's talk about growing old
If you are not Mick Jagger or any other money-loaded celebrity, which is not the case for most of us, chances are you will be lonely; let me try to explain.
Let's say you have had lots of friends throughout your life. By the time you hit 60, some have moved away, some passed away, and the ones you still know do not get around as much. You find yourself full of energy and disposition, but your old friends may not. Oh, let's not forget growing old and grumpy.
We either get more relaxed and easy-going or we become more uptight and grumpy as we age. Some of your dear friends might become grumpy, and the side effect of that is fighting and losing friends, thus further diluting your family of friends. Now Susan is not talking to Anne. We become more intolerant and sensitive to things we once didn't.
You see young people around you. They are having fun like you used to have, so you deduce that befriending young people will keep you young. Just so you know, this will only happen in your dreams
You might know them from activities like classes you take, yoga, martial arts, or whatever activity you do to connect with others. But young people don't want to hang out with people their parents' age, did you? No, you did not. And why would you want to go back to the been there done that kind of place?
The manifestations of time passage are truly melodramatic. We cannot anticipate things in the future, and all attempts to control it are doomed to fail. Life will drag you down to whatever hole it wants
But here's a way to escape getting old without looking like these people dressing in young clothes and looking ridiculous. Of course, it would help if you kept your youth's supple mind in good shape. And there is a way to do that
There are these wormholes in the fabric of the cosmos, and they can take you to the universe of your youth. I have identified at least one of those. You must be close to young people but not necessarily be them. It's all about the dream. You see, young people are not young because they look cute and young. They are young because they believe the dream. And you must find a way to remember the dream
And here's the good news. As you age, you begin to again approach the dream state, assuming you were ever a dreamer. Some call it the second adolescence? Let me try to give you an example of my own — music.
Most of us old farts are seriously stuck in the past when it comes to music. And the basic complaint is that music today sucks, and I don't like anything they play. But the truth is that it doesn't suck at all! We're going through one of the most prolific and inspirational cycles in music ever. So why can't you hear? Right? This is the question you should be asking yourself.
But if you feel the spirit, you’ll meet the young at heart. If you feel it and enjoy the same way you did when young, you’ll tap into the fountain of youth. The more I connect with the energy of today, the more I feel relevant. But if I keep connected to the past, life gets stiffer, cluttered, and melancholic. Life becomes just a memory.
You can extrapolate this idea to any other territory. Art, martial arts, sports, dance. Your life must be fluid and not a bag of old trinkets. And the only way to achieve that is to keep connecting to the passion of discovering new things and believing in the dream. As we age we acquire a lot of experience and become savvy in so many ways. But in this process, we also become disbelievers, and we learn not to be bothered and to always protect ourselves from inconveniences. But let's go back to loneliness.
But you are still lonely, and you see fewer people around. But if you connect with the dream, you'll notice that you'll meet other dreamers, and life happens in the interactions that occur between dreamers.
There are two outcomes to this situation. One is the older adult who dresses young and looks ridiculous. The other is the person who genuinely connects with the dream. If you do, even young people will overlook your age because you're sharing something real with them, and that's ageless. The dream is ageless, but your body ain’t. But what is this dream you vaguely talk about sir?
The dream is when you’re happy; the dream is what makes you keep going and be excited for that cup of coffee in the morning and one more day; the dream is what arouses you; the dream is that you are thirsty to discover and learn one more thing; the dream is the child, the fearless, the curious and the laughter. Have a great day and more coffee, please.
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